Fleeting Moments

Thanksgiving morming, I awoke to the most beuatiful sunrise I had seen in a long time. I took pictures with my iPhone, but I decided to grab my big camera and set it to get the color I was seeing. It was the deepest red or orange, I have seen in a long time. But I almost lost the picture of the moment, due to a mistake. I forget I had a tele extender on the long lens, and it only shots by manually focusing. But I just grabbed the camera and starting clicking away. It was a couple of weeks later, when I went to change the lens, I realized the mistake I had made. Out of all the pictures I took, I salvaged one. But that one good picture made up for the mistake I had made. That sunrise will always remind me of the Thanksgiving morning of 2023.

This past weekend trip with the boys to Arkansas was a flying trip, and many other family members came as well. While 19 of my family could not make, 23 of us did go. We packed in a lot of fun memories in 48 hours. Moments that will always be ingrained in our minds. One of the boys coming home made the comment about the travel time was almost the same as the time we stayed. He was right. But the laughter, hiking, food, boardgames, picture booth fun, "fake" iceskating, camp fire fun, knive shopping. hunting store shopping, skateboard mishap, bow shooting and a parade that was the best I have seen, will always stay in our minds. If anyone needs a reminder, Aunt Kay and I documented it well.

The sunrise will always be remembered from that one picture, and I hope that my remaining child and Kayla's children will be able to gather all those pictures I have taken and remember moments from the past. I hope they remember the good memories or laugh at all the hayfield and farm pictures having to work. I do not want their mother to be a fleeting moment as they grow older. There will be pictures of their baby years they will not remember, and pictures that will take them back to a perfect memory. Trust me over the last few months, I have watched videos, looked at pictures and held things in my hand that brought a flood of emotions in my mind that rolled down my cheeks in a sea of tears. But each thing brought fleeting memories back front and center in my mind with vivid detail; Good memories!

The reason I mentioned the sunrise was because that picture will forever remind me of the first Thanksgiving without my daughter. In all my sadness, God showed me a beautiful sunrise that I needed that morning. This past trip with family, I hoped allowed the boys to see they still have a part of their mother being with the Newport crew. I pray that we make the moments count. Sometime in the future that one fast weekend to Arkansas will be brought up again, and it will be remembered as a weekend that was full of family, fun and love. We should all make the most of each moment count, evenif it does not go exactly as you planned.

Dawn Renee